Tuesday, December 27, 2022

2022 "Top Ten" List - #11

 11. *sigh*


I have gotten rather good at avoiding stuff I know I won’t like, and I loathe “worst of” lists and other joy-sucking negative commentary. But the bottom’s got to be somewhere and these were the only ones that I outright disliked or was overwhelmingly disappointed by.




Babylon


I had difficulty placing this, because there are parts of this that I genuinely liked. And it’s not … *completely* incomprehensible. But it *is* a mess. In many ways, some more literal than others, one of which is that within the first five minutes we see an elephant spew gallons of poop of varying consistencies all over one of the characters, which I guess is supposed to set the tone for the remaining 3+ hours. This feels like a self-indulgence that a director of Damien Chazelle’s age and point in his career is too young to be making. There are other films that deal with this subject matter and era of moviemaking much better than this, though I suppose what sets this apart is Chazelle’s need for us to know how bawdy and decadent (and sprayed with bodily fluids and cocaine) this era of Hollywood was. I liked the chaotic eight-movies-at-a-time silent film set scene. I liked the “first day of shooting the talkie” scene. Jean Smart’s scene with Brad Pitt is actually pretty exquisite. A lot of the performances really come through in the few moments when this movie calms the hell down. But everything is so frenetic most of the time that I feel like audiences should be warned not to drink coffee or Red Bull while watching. The scene with Tobey Maquire feels like it’s from another movie entirely (specifically a movie called BOOGIE NIGHTS). There should be way more with Jovan Adepo and Li Jun Li and their characters should have been much better developed and not just footnotes, especially as they’re two of the very few people of color in the movie. And those last five minutes of “did you see what I did there?” are unforgivable. To quote MST3K - “never put a good movie in the middle of your crappy movie.” Not that I think this movie is actually crappy, but dude – don’t invite people to compare your movie to SINGIN’ IN THE dang RAIN! (In theaters.)





Fantastic Beasts: The Secrets of Dumbledore


William Goldman once talked about writing BUTCH CASSIDY AND THE SUNDANCE KID, which he originally planned as a novel until he realized he didn’t want to do all the research it would require. He figured that if he wrote a screenplay to be made into a movie, then someone else (i.e., the director) would have to do all that work. That feels almost exactly like what’s happened with these films. The author doesn’t want to relinquish control of the story, she knows WB will just get someone else to do it if she doesn’t, but she doesn’t want to do all the worldbuilding required to flesh it out, like she did with the Potter canon. I can’t say I blame her, but the trouble is, there’s no one who’s as qualified as she is to do that, since it’s her story to begin with. I had hopes for this series and for this particular installment. I was intrigued by the casting of Mads Mikkelsen, as well as the return of Steve Kloves as co-writer (my old fandom peeps know my Kloves-apologist ways from way back). But this is just an increasingly confusing mess with no real purpose, especially since everyone who’s seen the Potter movies and read the books knows what eventually happens down the line. I’ve always loved coming back to this world, even if the more recent movies haven’t been the greatest (not to mention the change in my feelings about the author the past few years), but every time there’s a new installment it feels less and less like the home it used to be. (Available on HBOMax and for rent on other streaming platforms.)




The Invitation


Not to be confused with the 2015 Karyn Kusama film of the same name. This one starts off okay, and I could have gotten behind a reimagining of the Brides of Dracula story, which doesn’t get enough love in my opinion. I love seeing Game of Thrones’s Nathalie Emanuel in a lead role. And while it might seem like the main character makes some dumb decisions, I can’t help thinking a lot of people would make the same choices if they were told they had some extremely wealthy long-lost relatives who wanted to connect with them. It breaks down pretty quickly, though, once the actual horror elements kick in. I’m rarely a fan of women pitted against each other for *any* reason, but especially when it’s over a man, and this is no exception – especially given who these other women turn out to be. Why are they so bitchy towards our heroine when they’re all essentially on the same team? Why do none of them consider teaming up and killing him? I mean, the lesbian vampire trope is RIGHT THERE, people! (Available to rent on streaming services.)


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